lost memories
by Shadow Heaven
Summary: after accepting the mission lass and arme has set out to uncover the truth that lies behind lass' memories and now its in your hand to write the outcome of this story
1. Chapter 1

**OK THIS IS MY FIRST ACTUAL ATTEMPT TO POST ANY STORY ON THIS SITE SO THIS IS MY FIRST FAN FIC THE STORY BEHIND THIS IS ACTUALLY INSPIRED BY THE LIFE STORY OF OUR ENGLISH TEACHER WITH A TWIST OF MY OWN FEELINGS SO ENJOY READING….. :3**

**OH AND BEFORE YOU GET CONFUSED MOST ARE LASS'POV**

**DISCLAIMER: I REGRET TO SAY THAT I DON'T OWN GRAND CHASE BUT I DO OWN ITS PLOT AND SOME OC HAPPY READING ^_^**

**LOST MEMORIES**

**It was a pleasant day at the grand chase castle the sun, shining brightly the skies, blue the temperature, moderate**

**It was indeed a fine day to relax , no one to disturb you nor annoy you the rest of the chase did the same arme and mari in the library, elesis in ronan near the fire place inside the castle, jin and amy in the music room and I don't even want to know what they are doing there, ryan and lire I guess they're in the forest meditating, and seighart he joined me under the tree the only difference is that he is sleeping while im just thinking of my past**

**As I was thinking very deeply probably lost in my own memory the castle bell rang waking me from my deep thought **

**there's an urgent mission it had been a while since the last time we had an urgent mission, the last was the battle with dark anmon**

"**gather around there's an urgent mission we have to complete immediately" started by the knight master as every one gathered around for the briefing and information regarding the target and the mission**

"**every one's here? Good! Now I will announce the mission: our mission is to track a person named mordred"**

**As the knight master mentioned the name my vision went black fragments of my lost memories, coming back to me all at once, pain starting to form worsening every second until my mind didn't take it' my body shut down causing me to collapse**

**After the incident i found myself awake trying to cope with the pain inside the infirmary, my vision still blurred and i saw a violet blob**

"**lass are you allright?"**

**My head didn't process the voice at first because of the pain but after a while it came to me it was arme who asked, arme is a battle mage who is the complete opposite of me but somehow we managed to be friends, well she is my only friend anyways so I guess….**

"**bermesia to lass! Hey lass wake up are you fine?"**

"**Oh right sorry its just that my memo ARGHHHHHH!" but before I could even finish my sentence I was shot with extreme pain I could here a large commotion but I didn't care I was too busy trying to figure out how to ease this pain but nothing seemed to work it only worsens every second then again my mind went black then memories appear,…. Memories of my child hood playing in a movie like scene flashbacks and lots of it keep playing in my mind**

**(flashback)**

"**hey lass do you know what friendship is?"**

**how can you ask something so hard to answer, said by the kid with white hair and sapphire eyes **

**(hey is that me? I don't remember anything like this I don't remember anything)**

"**(chuckles) you see lass **_**friendship is the poor relation of man's animal urges; and like poor mans relation, it stands by us when food, drink, sex and money have blown on another guys dice. Friendship, like home, is where we go when nobody else will have us"**_

**Dad is that you? Since when did you learn poetry?**

"**Oh that I read it from a news paper from an article written by Julie burchill oh its already time sorry son but I guess I have to go back to the farm now or else we might not have anything for dinner"**

**Yes dad!**

**(I never knew what kind of family I have my first memory started after the time I was rescued by the grand chase in the hands of that evil witch)**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

"**ARE YOU INSANE! Even thou a laundry girl I would fight for my son even if it costs me my life"**

**MOM NO!**

**(mom…..)**

**(gasp) it was shocking for me to see my own mother died to protect me from that man**

"**leslie! mordred you will pay!"**

"**(smirk)go ahead if you dare you poor people have no use in this world, this world would be better off without you! Wahahahahah"**

"**You're wrong **_**a poor man may be said rich in the midst of his poverty, so long as he enjoys the interior sunshine o a developed friend .but the wealthiest man, on the contrary is poor and miserable, if he has no friend to whom he can disclose the secrets of his heart….."**_

"**Enough of your mumbo jumbo DIE!"**

**(after that very scene my vision went black again but this time without the pain I actually have no memories of my parents then this happened what the hell is happening to me?)**

"**LASS? LASS ? LASS WAKE UP!" I was startled the cry of the purple haired mage**

"**ugh huh what happened?" I told to her wanting some explanation on what really happen but the mages answer did not satisfy me I need answer as to who I am and what happened at that very time and who was that man….**

**(the next day we started the mission and during our search I found something that caught my attention it was small cottage inside the forest with a small farm with plants beaming with life then I thought to my self "isn't that the one in my dream? Then I called their attention…)**

**Guys lets take a break here for a while there's something I need to check out**

"**Ok lets take a break" replied by the magic knight followed be the red headed knight who was starving**

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

**Then I went to the cottage my head aching every step I take closer to the cottage heh it must mean that this place has something to do with my lost memory**

**The cottage was broken rather old blood marked its wall then it hit me, everything returned to me every single memory that I have lost it was painful, tears broke free from my eyes.., not because of the pain but because of the memories of my family now I know who I really was it was painful to know that your family died trying to protect you but ended up wasting their lives for nothing was changed **

**Then I asked myself "why is this happening to me? WHY!"I cried letting all my tears fall, letting emotion take over my body**

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

"**lunch is served! Hey where is lass?" asked by the mage who is serving the lunch**

"**I saw him entering a small cottage near here" answered by the druid**

"**oh…. You guys eat first ill go get him"**

**(seriously what in the world is lass doing its very unusual for him)**

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

**I was there.., inside, all alone, not wanting anyone to see me, to see me crying,**

**I cant take it, what happened to me, what really happen before I was possessed then someone opened the door it was arme shocked to see me crying for the first time…, then I told her to just go away that I wanted to be alone.., but she refused she was there asking as for why I am crying, at first I didn't talk but she broke our silence she told that we should hurry back before the meal gets cold, then I wiped my eyes dry then got up, and put again that expressionless mask and ask her a favor "please don't let anyone know what happened here I don't want them to worry" she smiled then ask me if I can tell her what happened then I replied her I told her that if she kept quiet about it I will tell her, she nodded in response**

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

"**what's taking arme so long just to call that stupid thief?" asked by the red headed knight with little traces of annoyance in her voice**

"**let the two lovebirds be" said by the blue haired magic knight**

"**who you calling lovebird" I shouted then he tried to run but he failed arme used her stone curse then I asked him where did he get that idea he didn't answer me so I have no choice I used my dark memories to call kaze aze ronan fainted before kaze aze could even touch him**

**The red headed knight charged at me angrily but the druid and archer stopped us both they reminded us that we are on a mission then the knight replied angrily she told that I'm not a true friend for trying to hurt my own friend then I replied "do you know the true meaning of friendship?" then she paused not being able to answer I answered for her **

"**heh.., **_**life leads the thoughtful man on a path of many windings…, now the course is checked, now it runs straight again but when two people are at one in their inmost hearts.., they shatter even the strength of iron or bronze.., and when two people understand each other in their inmost hearths.., their words are sweet and strong.., like the fragrant of orchids**_**"**

**Then everyone stared at me disbelievingly "lass is that you? Since when did you learn such poetry" they asked me but I didn't answer the only thing I told them was my father taught it to me….**

**After a while we resumed our hunt for mordred the one who killed my parents, the one who kidnapped me to become kaze aze's vessel**

**As night falls we decided to call it a day and camp for the night then arme's persistency kicks in just on cue after everyone fell asleep, she asked me what really happen I told her that I don't want to talk about it but she replied with her war staff she said that I might change my mind.., then I gave a big sigh then started to tell her the truth**

**(flashback)**

**I grew up in a poor family.., my mother was a laundry girl, my father was a farmer.. the cottage we just passed by earlier.., that was our home…. "Well it used to be" I whispered even thou poor my family was rich it may not be wealth and gold but our house is always overflowing with love.., my father loves poetry my mother likes literature we planned to led a simple life but on that faithful day everything was changed**

"**What happened?" arme asked me**

**Then I continued**

**My family was slaughtered by him.., mordred, he is the one who kidnapped me and offered me to kaze aze he is the one responsible for all of this he is the one responsible for the death of my parents…**

**(then as I continued tears start forming I tried to hide them but it everything flowed right down my cheeks)**

"**so that's what really happened"**

**The red headed knight startled me then I started "why are you all awake? Arme?"**

"**don't look at me I didn't say anything" answered by the mage**

**Then the magic knight talk "don't blame anyone.., you know its easy to figure out when it comes down to both of you, when the both of you are together we can read you like a book full of nursery rhymes.."**

**Then I replied with a big sigh "I guess you now know everything?"**

"**don't be so selfish" the dancer replied then followed by the archer "yeah.., we only wanted to help"**

**Then I asked "why do you want to help me? I'm the one who cause all of this.., I killed many innocent villagers.., even people that are close to you WHY?" then without thinking I ran away hoping to get some answers**

"**HEY COME BACK HERE!" shouted by the fighter**

**arme replied he told the fighter to let me be alone myself**

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

**There I was alone again in the darkness.., crying.., asking why was I born.., what was my purpose in life.., I wish I could just die…**

"**Heh.., I know that no one cares about me.., I know that every one hates me.., then why? Why are they trying to help?**

**Cant they see they're just making me suffer more.., it' so hard… I cant go on anymore…**

**I wish that my life would end.., every one would be happier I know….**

**But why? Why didn't they just end my life?...**

**They know who I am.., they know what I have done….**

**Why?(I shouted) WHY? I NEED SOME ANSWERS.. IM CONFUSED.. TELL ME! WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?**

**should I live or should I just disappear into thin air" ( I whispered then sobbed.., I let all my feeling out.., then I felt my heart., breaking and crumbling.., like it couldn't break more .., I don't know what to do anymore… please someone help me…)**

**my vision went black then I thought to myself "so this is it then.., its better for me to die….. I hope that everyone would be happier…arme….**

**(then I passed out and collapsed) I found myself in a dark empty room it felt very cold and uncomfortable then I think to myself "is this what its like to die.., when you have too many sins to atone for?" then a sudden flash of light and I thought I heard some thing… a cold voice started "don't choose…. death" then it felt very cold and the voice sounded louder like it was getting closer to me **_**"don't choose death….. to….. to protect someone… you love….. cause you're….. only hurting…. Hurting them…."**_** Then it became quiet too quiet the silence was deafening then I closed my eyes to pray and when I opened my eyes I found myself under the trees surrounded by the chasers.., they are crying and I asked them "why are they crying?"**

**Arme answered "don't worry us like that you fool" then she hugged me very tight then I asked again "can somebody please tell me what happened?"**

"**well you see here we were worried last night because you didn't return so we started searching and then a little while ago we found your cold body.., and you're not breathing either" the dancer started followed by the druid "well I did try to revive you of course but it didn't work.., and it looked like you're already dead from sometime"**

"**Heh" I started then whispered "is it really ok for me to live?"**

**I was wondering to myself as to what happened.., is that a dream? But no this one felt very different it felt so real like it was really happening.., I need some answers and I think theres only one man who can answer me… MORDRED…**

"**Guys" I started "let us continue this mission I have some questions that needed to be answered.., and it can only be answered by him"**

**Everyone looked at me with determination and willingness to help me, starting at that moment I have finally felt that I belong…..**

_**To know someone here or there with whom you feel there is understanding in spite of distances or thoughts unexpressed – that can make of this earth a garden**_

**Now I have finally understand what my father meant when he say those things to me…**

**The end….**

**Wew finally I have succeded and failed at the same time and as you see it is lacking some parts at the end well that was actually part of my plan (excuses) and as a writer and grand chaser I would like to know your opinion for the ending and as soon as I have picked the best I would immideately post the story.., who know maybe your story will be the one posted for the sequel :3**

**Thank you guys for reading my fanfic read and reviews ^_^ hope you enjoy reading**


	2. Chapter 2

Ok I am truly sorry about the trouble this is because of my stupidity this is BL4CKh34V3N and I'm having issues about school and my account passwords so this is the continuation of lost memories I sincerely apologize for the long update

Oh and another reminder most are lass pov's since lass is going on a journey alone (spoiler alert!)

Disclaimer:

I don't own any of the grand chase characters but I do own this copyright fanfic this account and this plot I hope I don't forget my password again

Lost memories chapter 2

After being one with my friends for the first time since that day I have to part them again.., not knowing if I will be able to meet them again.., here I am in front of xenia frontier the land of the highlanders awaits..,

(flashback)

After being one with my friends I have decided to continue to this journey alone.., I don't want them to worry for me, and I don't want them to be hurt because of me so I have decide to go on alone.., the next day before we departed on our journey I have decided to help lire and arme prepare our breakfast.., while both of them are distracted I have done it…, I put poison in their meal, not lethal but enough to paralyze them for days..

Then it happened…..

Arme: breakfast is served ^^

Elesis: finally after 600 years

Ryan: yeah im starving

Lire: oh and lass helped us well he did almost all so thank him

Everyone looked at me with surprised eyes.., oh yeah I never cooked for then =_= (sigh) I guess its natural

Ronan: hmmmmmmm let me taste it…

Jin: how did it taste (whispers) please tell me its better than lire's

Lire: HEY I HEARD THAT!

Ronan: wow this is heavenly (sparkling eyes)

After that statement everyone tasted my meal then something happened ronan just became paralyzed followed by the others..,, then I apologized to them I told them about how dangerous mordred was and that I don't want them to be hurt because of me after all this is my fight.., after explaining everything arme cried in front of everyone asking me why did I do this.., then I apologized to her and everyone saying one thing with it "I am doing this because I love you arme and I don't want you to be hurt"….

After that there was silence within us then I left without a trace leaving my pet with them to protect them at any cost

(present)

I can feel it I am close this aura this tainted mana it reeks and I can feel it.., there was a gate and I don't know what awaits me there perhaps if I enter I wont be able to return alive but if its to protect them I would sacrifice everything for them because they have saved me from my darkness….

"hear me my son _every one of us was born with both light and dark residing inside us and that's what's keeping the balance remember this word my dear son shadow is the darkness casted from light even thou light is tour enemy you will always find a way to help those in need _"

Father, mother I promise I would never forget everything you have taught me and I will do everything to save my friends even thou it means I have to hurt them…

(SFX: giant doors opening)

Wew finally after I don't know how many months I was able to update again woooooooooooooooooooooooooo (howling+cheers) any ways read and reviews oh and two more things thank you for your patience and SFX means sound effects for those who don't know it thank you again happy reading


	3. Chapter 3

Wew class already ended now so I don't have anymore reasons not to update and if you notice that every chapter has different themes or styles of writing that is indeed intentional to keep the curiosity of some readers alive so that's that here's another chapter hope you enjoy reading ^^

Chapter 3: alone

Its been a while since I have opened the gates of xenia probably an hour or so and it feels kinda different than the last time.., the demonic energy is overwhelming and there this intriguing silence too quiet if you ask me and there's no one here except for me.., but I feel like im being watched.., I hope the others are okay.., If anything happened to them I don't what to do..,

Im still lost in the xenia frontier and its getting dark and the landscape seems to change every turn., and the silence,, ever so quiet but I feel that I am being watched from every corner of the forest but the presence of anyone I cannot feel ., after a little while something strange happened the pressure in the surrounding increases ,I can feel my body trembling from the tremendous pressure, the wind blowing so hard the moon changing colors from pale yellow to bright red., then everything stopped and out of nowhere a man appeared., and before I could even raise my guard up I was already hit by a fatal blow, as I was hit my body shut down and I cant move even a muscle and all I can do was stare to his face and try to find out who he was.., as I stare to his face the moon shone ever so brightly and the time I saw his face, memories , fragments of memories are returning to me slowly and painfully.., and before I faint because of the pain there's only four words im able to say "duel who are you?"

After a while I woke up knowing that the sun is already up.., knowing about the event last night I checked myself for any injuries luckily I dint have any injuries and the only thing missing is my scarf., other than that im okay but I feel very strange.., I felt like every bit of my strength was being sapped away but I braced myself for what was supposed to happen next.., after a while I regained my energy., with new goals and new target., "DUEL"

I need to know who he was and what was his part in my life…..

Narrator: meanwhile lets figure out what was happening between arme's group (ronan's PoV)

Finnaly im able to move after 2 days., what was lass thinking anyway why does he need to poison us like that and he hurt arme's feelings too….

When I find him ill kill him…., I said to myself seeing arme crying in the corner, I tried to approach her and comfort her but elesis stopped me and told me that It would be best for her to be alone and think and so I let her be.,, after a few minutes we prepared our weapons, armor and supplies then we head out in search of lass and to complete our mission..,

That night we took our break., after we ate our supper the other members took their rest while im still awake and thinking about lass

(flashback)

Ronan: ugh last night I have a very bad dream and it brought very bad memories on how my parents died

Elesis: what was the dream about?

Lass: you tell yourself that you are an educated person yet you tend to say that a mere dream brought fort a bad memories

Elesis: hey

Ronan: no let him be., im not surprised if you talk like that about memories after all you have no memories whatsoever and your memories started after we saved you so be thankful

Elesis: yeah., why cant you be a little more helpful sometimes

Arme: will all of you shut up., you're only making things worse

Lass: _there is no such thing as good and bad memories.., only those that bring pain and smiles_

(end)

"Hey! Ronan wake up geez" I was waked up by that familiar voice and to my sight I saw elesis., It was already morning .., after taking our breakfast we departed in search of lass and completing our mission…

3 hours later and we still have no sign of him.., lass being a thief was a trouble for us because it meant that he can move at very fast pace without leaving any trace but after several more hours after we ate our lunch we have our break and found his scarf.., for some reason it was full of cuts and blood.., to evry ones concern especially arme, we scanned the scarf if the blood belonged to lass and we expected right, after the scan was finished we found two different blood one from lass and the other.., from someone knowing that we continued our search following the direction where we found his scarf.., after a while it was night time we ate our dinner., our topic was about lass as usual but this time it was different because arme was quiet., her silence was noticeable but the others kept talking about him.., I guess in order to ease the pain she feels she took the honor in sleeping ahead of us after a little while we followed her but to our surprise she was not there…

Wew that's that for chapter 3 im sorry If I kept my readers waiting and some of my chapters are very short and im also sorry cause I wont be able to write for a while because of some personal problems but I promise to finish this story, and as for arme don't worry they'll be meeting again ^^, well that's that thank you and hope you enjoyed reading reads and reviews ^w^


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